Oh. For. The. Love. Of. God. Give me strength.

There are two things you should never do when you are angry.
Blog or have sex whilst driving.
I no longer own a car.
You know those people who look like they do stuff but they don't?
The ones who reflect loads of light but when you stand right next to them, they are clear?
Remember that song Mr Cellophane in the musical Chicago?
I love that song.
If you are not familiar with it, the premise is that the guy singing it feels invisible.

"A human being's made of more than air" he says.....but what if that is not always true?
What if someone turns out to be just skin, and excellent hydraulics?
In my lifetime I have known a few of these people in passing.
My edges are rather sharp.
Either for self preservation reasons they move on quickly when they meet me , or when I meet them I keep on walking.
I can only be diplomatic to people without personalities for so long before I run out of conversation.
It is a failing, but one I am happy never to work on.
I am not running for president.
The only thing you get by sitting on a fence is splinters in your arse.
I tend to be a straight talker.

I wish I could tell you that this is because I am clever, however the opposite is true.
I speak my mind because I am lazy.
And yes, the opposite of clever is lazy.
I speak my mind because I can not be twatted to add cushioned words designed to prevent others hurting themselves on the sharp edges of the truth.
So when I meet cellophane humans I just piss off.....unless.....circumstances mean I need them to fulfill a purpose....like fill in a space......and then?
Then I'm fucked.
This happens rarely enough, but it happens.
As an ex boss once said to me " shit floats"
And so it does.
So here we are, and within the firing distance of my nihilistic horizon are balloon animals parading as people and there is not a damn thing I can do about it other than sit quietly and wait for them to float away.
Only the wind is moving slowly, and the cistern appears to be blocked.
I find I am grinding my teeth in my sleep.
Some people imagine that the World is full of the 'haves' and the 'have nots', but I think this is not true.
The World is full of the 'can' and 'can nots'.
The 'can nots' can not make decisions, they can not think beyond the space they immediately occupy, they can not see across a room let alone over an horizon. 'Can nots' can not contribute forward motion to discussion, they can not read between the lines, they can not face unpleasant truths, they can not imagine solutions, they can not see the writing on the wall, they can not open their minds, they can not reach for higher ideals, they can not express their dreams, they can not grow, they can not contribute to the growth of others.
They sit and occupy chairs that may as well be empty, they steal oxygen from kittens, they eventually spiral into the internal nothingness that is their destiny.
They exhaust me.
I like the 'cans'.
They do stuff.
I often find 'can nots' huddled in groups.
Even nature recognises the simply safety in numbers trick.
When 'can nots' hang out with 'cans', those who 'can' call them energy vampires.
When I meet them in business I call them 'lessons in patience'.
Some religions believe you must face a problem again and again until you learn from it.
This is why I am an atheist.
I say, if something is really pissing you off and it won't go away, kill it.
Only that's not always practical, nor legal.
Which is giving me the shits.
Which is why I am not driving whilst having sex today.
Which is an image I shall leave you with as I head off to the 'escape proof wet paper bag' factory to stand next to people who could not start fights in breweries.
With my gun.